Creepers of Costco!

By now the majority of the American internet has probably happened upon the People of Wal-Mart website at least once, one way or another. Today I'm here to suggest that a new website be made for another relatively well-known store around these parts. It's name? The Creepers of Costco. I've been to the Costco near my town several times without problem of 'creepers', but I swear these past few times it's becoming pretty evident that they're starting to slowly take over the city that's only like twenty minutes away from where I live, if even that.



I clearly recall a moment where my mom, sister, and I were walking around Costco in the frozen food aisles when this weird dude with a gross, wet-ish afro appeared by the cake section. Just looking at the grease-stained lardy shirt of his paired with his creepy fro for a split second will get you to mutter "uhh, let's get out of here now please." I turned my back from this dude, and strangely enough every single time I looked over my shoulder, there he was, lurking around the cakes, staring straight at me. I was tempted to go over there, maybe nudge him a little, and say "You got a problem, ya dolt?" Of course I didn't do this in the end, but I swear it was tempting. I was also tempted to call security on him, which I would've done if he didn't ominously disappear the last time I turned around.

There were others in the store that showed Creepers of Costco potential; mainly a small group of women who didn't know what the heck the difference was between a well-built body and a freakishly muscular one. The difference: one makes you look good while the other one makes you look like the female version of the Incredible Hulk (and by that I do NOT mean She-Hulk). At least they weren't as bad as the woman who looked like she was growing a life-sized reincarnation of Big Bird on top of her head.

Uhh... That's three good examples right? Well there's your Creepers of Costco debut. Now someone go make the site, 'cause I don't have the time today.